Friday, February 18, 2005

boom chika boom

HI!!!!

Okay, it's been awhile. I'm sorry.

Let's see, madcap-recap of my life recently. After a SLEW of bad things and bad days and general badness, I can honestly say that I'm good again. God really brought me through these past two weeks and it's been awesome and I'm so thankful. God is good 100%!
My project writing part is taken care of, and tomorrow I'm meeting with Rosario to glue it all together and then all we have left to do is present it. Yay!! Then I'll have a week of HARDCORE studying to get ready for my next test. Haha, I am so behind on Chemistry reading and homework it's not even funny.

SANE was wonderful. Dinner was great, coffee was great, screaming and running and taking pictures was great, the movie Hitch was REALLY great. Go here to see pictures of our adventures.

On Tuesday I'm going with Amy and two other girls to Southpoint to go prom dress shopping.....I don't know why they are going there, unless they want to pay roughly a million dollars for their dresses.
I might be going to Homeschool Prom. hahahahahaha
I can't remember if I told you that already or not.....anyway, it's my last chance to go to any remote sort of prom. And a bunch of my friends are going, so it might be fun.

Now I have to go figure out if I'm supposed to go pick up my brother at UNC this afternoon.

Take chances, make mistakes, and get messy!!

love

Wednesday, February 09, 2005

oh, my darlings

Tuesday Wednesday break my heart
Thursday doesn't even start
It's Friday, I'm in love

::::::Rachel floats away on a luuuuvvv bubble of happiness:::::::










HAHAHAHAHA. Okay no, I'm not in love. I just needed a good laugh there, but I do actually like that song. Had you going for a second though, didn't I?? Mmm hmm, you know I did. I laugh at you now. Bwahaha.

To answer the question that has been going around , SANE!!! is Single Awareness Night Extravaganza!!! And it’s going to be AWESOME!! Which stands for AWESOME!! And no, you can't come, this is a private affair. It's one harsh, cruel world you live in here, isn't it....mm, sorry for ya…

Anyway, Josh and I just got back from another hilarious time in G-boro. Small (which is actually quite large) group and then Wendy's hangout fun, with craziness for all and some creepy drive-thru peeps hanging out their windows. It was a most awesome of times.
On the downer side, my car started smelling NASTY as soon as we got off the interstate at our exit. So I don't know what's up with that. I really don't need Beverly to be broken right now. Grr. All her technical parts are fine, so who knows what her dealio is. Blah.

Lab was wretch today. That's okay though. Chem and I are not getting along well this semester, but it's only week....5 or something, and I refuse to let it get the better of me. I'm set on getting an A on my next test, even if I have to study my butt off and become some kind of recluse and never see any of you people and you won't hear from me until summer, and I'll come out as some kind of pasty blob with electrons pouring out my ears and wearing shirts that say things like "I survived freakin Electrochemistry" and maybe one with a picture of a big, smiling ion that says “Anti-negative”....

Wow, or maybe I should just stop with those ideas….

You can most please be praying for me because I’m kinda tense because we have a major time crunch on our project, which is now due in less than two weeks and we have no idea about anything and I need to do something about something but I don’t know what and I know I need to turn to God with all of this, and I am but….I don’t know. Something in the “work/school” part of my life is not sitting well right now, and I don’t know exactly what it is. So yeah, prayer would be most wonderful. And I’m also dealing with some relationships in my life right now, some are breaking apart and some are getting stronger, and I’m fine with that, and the ones that are getting stronger, that makes me SO happy, but it’s still weird to close a door that’s been there for so long, when I’m not even sure if it’s supposed to be closing, or if I’m just not trying hard enough to keep it open. And I know this really isn’t making all that much sense to you people and usually I don’t get all….emotional and gush my crap out for all to see. I promise I still won’t do it often J. But sometimes I just need to.

I want to dye my hair a more intense (and noticeable) red color sometime soon. My washout kind is almost all washed away and it’s time for some mad intense stuff. Oh yes, I shall show up with FLAMES shooting out of my head. (if I could have made “flames” all red and wavy there, I would have, but since I can’t, just use your imagination.)

….No, don’t worry, my dad would never allow my head to be all flamey, I really don’t want it that color anyway. But there’s really only so much you can do to dark brown hair. I gotsta take what I can.

Okay, now I am just rambling. So, before it goes way off into the distance, I’m leaving.

I find your presence engaging and your conversation sparkling

love

Wednesday, February 02, 2005

it'd better not snow. or ice. or rain.

Hey hey hey. I'm what's happenin'

I have that part of the song stuck in my head. Sorry.

Anyway, I'm back from my venture down to the coastal area. As I expected, I was living with the agony of not being there to go to Bear Island. Now my dad's watching a Step Into Liquid type movie that we got off Ebay, only it's of borders, not surfers. It is poorly produced and has emo-screamo music in the background, but the ride footage is awesome. Anyway, it makes me want summer to be here NOW. Yargh! I'm counting the days.....

Amy and I are going shopping for SAN on Friday. whoop whoop!!

I'm trying to decide what I think about my new background style. I don't know if it's too......something. Like, serious maybe? I'll probably keep it for a while though, because I do like it, and I'm too lazy to change it.

Wow. This movie is just getting to be less and less boarding and more and more random shots of plants and a guy in his car.....

Okay well, this is a REALLY crappy post. I'm sorry it's wasted your time. I'm distracted and am going to go do something now.


the night is young and so am I


-rachel

who wants to be ordinary in a crazy, mixed up world?

Last night I had some insane urge to clean out my closet and drawers. It started with my looking for some funeral clothes and turned into a psycho clothing adventure. I've decided that
me + conservative clothes = yikes scary ew ew no.
I'm not talking about nice, dressy clothes here, those are GREAT. I'm talking like, Lands End type things. High waisted pants and square sweaters are not me.
I have this skirt and I asked mom if I should keep it or not and she said "well,
you might need it for a different job. Like if you work in an office or something." Yeah, I'm thinking maybe not.

I am in a MOOD. Not a bad Mood. Just one of those Moods that comes from a lack of human interaction. The rest of the mood stems from the knowledge that I will be getting up at 6:30 tomorrow so I can ride in the car for three hours, sit through a funeral with a bunch of sad people, then ride back home. Woocha and all that. It will be VERY annoying to be going to Jacksonville and living with the knowledge that I'm 30 minutes away from Bear Island with no way to get there. Yargh!
For breakfast I ate most of a bag of popcorn, and a bagel with cream cheese and Nutella....that isn't healthy by any means, so it might also have some part in The Mood. Mood is a funny word....

Happy February everyone. I'm counting the days to SAN!!! WOO!!!! I'm extremely excited.

Chem. test on Friday, SAT and ho-times with Amandalin on Saturday, (which will be way rockin fun), church and OFYfuntimes on Sunday. (Maybe a little Starbuck's action?? )
Lookin to be a good weekend. Now all I have to do is get there.


love

Monday, January 31, 2005

I had lab today, because I won't be there on Wednesday. Also today was "homework problem" day, it went fine.

My family watched King Aurthur last night. It's very good. "Better than Braveheart", said my dad. I told him "that was because Braveheart was Mel Gibson running around in a kilt and shaggy hair......not a good thing....."
Mom laughed.

Random:

"I love you"
"I know"

That is the best set of movie lines I think ever written. Someday, me and my whoever will say them, at least once. If you don't know what movie they are from, then go away. You can come back when you are cool.
Mmmm, hang on, I'm replaying it in my head....I watched it last night as well.....sigh....it's so perfect.....

Okay, anyway, ummmm......there was no church or OFY yesterday, because of the icy madness. I was SAD.
Emily spent the night on Saturday, so we hung out, painted our nails, did eachothers makeup, wallowed on the couch for a few hours...the usual. It was fun, we hadn't done a good hangout in months.
Nugget of nuggetness from that night (or at least something to this extent): "Girls are out there getting drunk or getting pregnant....and we're sitting here watching girly movies and doing eachothers makeup..." --Emily Beck

Amy, Emily, Jessica and I went to see Phantom of the Opera on Friday. It's very good. But be warned, it's a musical. No one told me this beforehand.

And now, I have to go see if I can find something decent for Wednesday. Dressy black clothes are not my thing, so this should be interesting....

luv U 4 evr
(don't ask, because i have no idea)

*rachel*

Friday, January 28, 2005

Well, after Daniel's comment moved me to a point very far from tears.....I am here to post.

Nothing much is new. I dyed my hair today, it's reddishy. I have class in the morning, which means this needs to be kept short. I finished all my homework for the two chapters already, so that's way way cool.

I don't know what to write about. I'm hyper right now. I think I get hyper when I'm cold. That seems to be the way it goes with me. I don't understand why.

Anyway, ummmmm, i worked tonight. Did three cakes. I think that's a record for me. If we'd been less busy, i could have done FOUR. Ooh LA!!!

Last night the cool kids regrouped at Cook Out. It was fun fun! We NEEEEED to do another one of those crazy mad sleepover hang out things. Those are the greatest.

And now, very quickly, I am out of subject matter. I hope this makes my bloogle blog happy. I do love it very much. It's been with me for a long time.

i promise i shall update it more.

love always,
rachel


Wednesday, January 19, 2005

my thoughts of the day

It was snowing on my way out of class today. In the midst of freezing and trying to find my keys, I looked around and once again absorbed the utter stillness that comes with snow. Even in a college parking lot, everything is in slow motion and all you can hear is your own breathing. It's one thing I really do love about snow.

There's life beyond this routine I'm in right now. I have a future waiting for me. My husband is out there in the world, even as I'm writing this. Of course, he's probably having some kind of life while I sit here at a computer......
hahaha. Ahem! But the point is, the little problems that seem so all encompassing at the moment really won't matter to me in a few years. My job right now is to learn the lessons God's trying to teach me as best as I can so that I'm ready for whatever comes next. If a guy (or girl) burns you, just let it go. Odds are you won't even know them in a few years. This part in your life is important, but it's not the have all, end all. Your real friends WILL be there in the future. So will your family, and so will God. That's what's important. Don't shirk that and diss them because you're busy trying to chase after something that you will never reach, because if you lose a good friend, no temporary boyfriend will ever be able to replace them. Figure out what's important and what will last. Build up your relationship with God, your parents, and friends that won't go two-faced on you. Focus on being yourself, not on what you need to be in order to have someone accept you. If you have to warp yourself for them to like you, then they probably aren't worth your time.
And never let yourself get so overwhelmed and busy that you can't stop for a second and remember that this isn't all that God has for you.


....snow makes Rachel reflective....

Love Always

Tuesday, January 18, 2005

summer seems so far away...

it's cold outside